I love the simplicity of this photo, and how peaceful he looks, just standing there, waiting.
Beautiful sculpture, subtle femdom.
Love her smile: She’s is up to no good!
A naked couple is having sexual intercourse in the missionary position. The woman is holding the man’s neck with her right hand as he props himself above her.
This photograph interested me because there are distinct signs of power dynamics to explore. Most notably, the woman physically on the bottom is gripping the man’s neck in what looks like a somewhat tight hold. Although many people might have a knee-jerk reaction and assume that this man is attacking the woman, my first instinct is to believe that she is controlling him, moving him toward and away from her in motions she enjoys. The thought of being made to move for the pleasure of a partner is intensely arousing to me, and this image instantly triggers that arousal.
Sadly, rape culture reactions overwhelm almost all public discourse about pornography. Heteronormative, pornographic depictions of sex are likely to trigger simple feelings of arousal. The leap to rape culture isn’t one that happens because of pornography but because of reactions to it, perhaps even more precisely to the specific overabundance of hegemonically skewed representations of what sex can be like.
The crux of the matter is that intentionality does not follow from appearance. Especially in sex, people should be free to be what they feel, not what they look like.
Update (July 28th, 2009): Sociorehab, the creator of this image, wrote in to me to say this:That’s our picture and I wanted to let you know that the assumptions you made were correct. I wasn’t in control. Her hand on my neck squeezed, pulled and pushed as she pleased. I could only give what she let me give.
Thanks for letting us know, and thanks again for creating and sharing a beautiful picture. :)(via biandbi, sociorehab)
A man leans his head toward a woman’s open hand, with his lips slightly parted and his eyes closed.
I love this picture. What’s striking is that, despite the spartan nature of the photograph’s closeup, the viewer can see myriad stories in it. Like good poetry, which depicts richness with brevity, I can say just as much about what’s not in this photograph as what is in it. The image resonates very strongly with a deep submissive emotionality within me.
If I let my eyes rest on the woman’s lips, she looks like a compassionate heroine, perhaps rescuing a beaten and tortured man as though she were a magical healer. On the other hand, if I look on her eyes, she suddenly appears to be the reason for the man’s struggles. His face has similar effects; is he relaxing, or about to be recoiling? In this way, the photograph also highlights the simultaneous, and perhaps paradoxical, symbiosis between wanting and not-wanting, hurting and pleasuring, obeying and being freed.sexy couple … love her thumb on his lip
A smiling man wearing only close-fitting underwear pulls an arm-length glove off the hands of a woman seated near him.
I love this fun picture! It was suggested by Wendy Blackheart, who wrote:
I like the playful tug of war that seems to be going on with her gloves. At the edge of the photo, you can see the girl laughing, and the boy seems to enjoy it as well.
I find that when I’m truly having fun, I rarely think about what’s just happened or what’s to come next, and that’s the impression I get from this photograph. It’s kind of wonderful that there are no clues as to whether these models’ playtime is just beginning or if it’s coming to a close. The part of this image that provides the most insight, to me, is the fact that the man is wearing leather cuffs, but only his left wrist is buckled into the restraint while the other buckle dangles loosely at his side; they’re letting the toys be just toys.
The fact that both models are obviously having a good time makes it easy to engage with the activity—whatever it is—depicted here. It’s in our nature to enjoy seeing other people happy and, despite the misguided pathologizing beliefs many folks hold about sadomasochists, this basic principle of human empathy is no different for us than for people who like to fuck differently. Indeed, if you’re not enjoying yourself, then it’s probably time to go find something else you will enjoy.
Sex, just like the rest of life, is supposed to be fun. If it’s not, then it’s up to you to make it fun. Not only are you missing out on great sex if you don’t, you’re not doing your sex partner any favors by pretending to be enjoying yourself when you’re not.
On a bed, a blindfolded man is gently bitten on the lips by a woman who has slipped her hand underneath his unzipped jeans. Bright red lipstick marks line the man’s torso.
This picture caught my eye because the evidence of what came before is wonderfully obvious. Kissing is excellent foreplay, and the positions of the models, now necessarily different than when she kissed him, pulls me into thinking about what they’ll do next. I also love the playful smile glimmering on the woman’s lips and the open-palmed, relaxed position of the man’s arms and hands above his head.
Despite the penchant many people think a submissive guy like me would have for only somewhat more intense sex, I genuinely like calmer and more comfortable encounters, as well. This shouldn’t really be a surprise, since sex can be deeply emotional. Just as I enjoy being penetrated, I enjoy penetrating as well.
It’s unfortunate that so many people are eager to limit and restrict what you may find enjoyable merely by telling you that you “shouldn’t.” Please think about that as you give and receive gifts this holiday season. Everyone needs and deserves the freedom to want what they want to want.